Connect to your inner wisdom

Anxious about how it’s all going to go?

Feeling confused or fatigued all the time?

Each pregnancy is different with a range of symptoms when we don’t feel ourselves. 

During one-one yoga therapy sessions with me, I support and guide you through a process to connect to your inner wisdom which empowers you to own and navigate your pregnancy. Such sessions may help you

    • Make decisions that feel true to you
    • Feel good about yourself
    • Advocate for yourself
    • Radiate confidence
    • Trust in the natural process of birth
    • Acceptance of your baby’s birth however it goes.

I am a certified yoga therapist, 500 hr yoga teacher with prenatal yoga training. I did much of my yoga therapy education during my first pregnancy. 

I conceived after a good year and half of yearning for a child. My first pregnancy ended in stillbirth but the yoga therapy studies helped me accept it and process grief with grace. I felt proud of my empowered pregnancy because I took the decisions that were true to me, I didn’t blame myself or my care providers for the loss.

A year after the loss, I conceived again. I was able to birth the child naturally in a hospital. The doctor is known in the birthing world as the most compassionate doctor in the area. I educated myself through books on natural birth and evidence-based birth. I advocated for myself and even hired a doula. The whole care team feared my body so much. They said statements like, ‘your body has shown the ability to get sick’, ‘your body tends to retain the placenta’. Thankfully, in spite of that I birthed my baby efficiently. After birth, the doctor gave the cord traction to encourage the placenta to come out quicker than my body was ready for. They, they were worried if part of the placenta or clots are there in my uterus. So, she stuck her hand in to check (very painful and unnecessary). She later said that it was just her fear. My doula was not watchful of what happened. My husband who hadn’t processed his trauma from the loss of first son, was not completely present and doesn’t know the impact this could have on my body.

The doctor also made a comment on how much I had pooped to my doula. This affected me so much that I switched to liquid diet in early labor of my last birth. I chose to birth at a Hospital to manage the fears of my husband and family. I got the best doctor in the area, I educated, self-advocated, stayed grounded and trusted my body. Still, birthing at the hospital impacted me in a bad way. Shortly after his birth, I became very depleted, the depletion lead to depression which lasted for several months. Birth going well is very important for the physical and psychological well-being of both the mother and the child. ‘Well’ doesn’t just mean a live. Probably the unnecessary intervention caused the depressed. It came from the deep sadness of being violated. I came out of the depression through regular yoga therapy sessions and daily mindfulness practices.

Two years after my son’s birthday, we traveled to India and Dubai. When I came back, I had moderate fever which kept me in bed for two+ weeks. This pushed out my cycle and hence impacted the quality of the egg released in that cycle. Apparently, egg quality is optimal if ovulation happens right around 14days. Unfortunately, I conceived again in that cycle. So, it turned out to be not viable and ended in a miscarriage.

Six months after that loss, I conceived again. In both my first and second pregnancies, my BP increased right around the birth and after birth. This time, I kept a check on my BP. My regular yoga practice during the pregnancy helped to keep it normal levels. I silently dreamed of birthing at home and giving my child a lotus birth (placenta stays attached until it falls off naturally). I couldn’t even start the conversation with my husband who was traumatized by the loss of our first son. I had decided to birth with the same doctor who caught my second child at the hospital.

I always integrate and optimize my life with the new information I have learned. I learn that two weeks after giving birth, it’s best to stay in bed or close to bed. Even if I birthed the hospital, I was to hire a midwife to come take care of me at home for the two weeks. From my recommendations I even found a CNM(midwife + nurse practitioner). Sarah, my midwife was so grounded. When I first reached out to her, my heart was yearning for the home birth but my husband won’t hear of it. So, I was going to hire her only for postpartum care. My baby girl thought differently.

My relation with my doctor’s office became strained at my 32nd week appointment. My girl was head down but they said she was head up to encourage me to get an ultrasound at week 36. They tested my blood for iron levels at my 28th week appointment and didn’t reach out to me when it was low. They just assumed that I won’t be ready to meet a hematologist to get treatments for improve it.  Hematologists are busy to get appointments with. I had to get a consultation, and get several treatments so many days apart. The treatments will only be scheduled after insurance pre-approval. It is best to have iron levels up at least one month before birth. The nurse/office manager pushed back when I asked her to send the paperwork to a couple of hospitals near me. I was racing against time because of a mistake they had made. When I called them out, they were unapologetic. I was infuriated.

At 34 weeks, I feel hiccups of my baby but couldn’t place where exactly they are coming from. They felt high up. I call the doctor’s office to see if I can get an appointment to check the baby’s position. If she was breech, I wanted to find out soon to line up treatments to flip her. The doc says, ‘there is no medical reason for you to be seen till 36 weeks. At 36 weeks, we can discuss the options: flip the breech, birth the breech or schedule a C-section’. I was infuriated again. I drove one hour to see my midwife who confirm her head was down and drove another one hour to an acupuncture appointment in case she was a breech.

Every time an incident happened with the doctor’s office, my thoughts will go back to having a home birth. I worried about birthing with the doctor I was so infuriated with and who had done an unnecessary intervention. My iron levels had to come up and my BP needs to be in control. They did. On my 40th bday and due date, I get frequent contractions about 8mins. If baby comes out too soon, I will birth at home. If BP increases, I will go to the Hospital and my midwife will be my doula. My contractions become irregular. My midwife checks and I am two cm dilated. Things progress quickly after that, baby was born within two hours.

My husband had to come head-on with his trauma. My first birth happened at a birthing center with midwives. There were similarities which couldn’t be ignored. Midwives have only this doppler to measure baby’s heartbeat. There was a point in my first son’s birth when the baby passes through the pelvic bone when the doppler can’t detect the heartbeat. His hreat rate was fine until then, yet fifteen minutes later, he was born still. He was trembling uncontrollably. In yoga therapy we use the term, ‘edge’. When we hold yoga postures, the discomfort of holding the pose, creates sensations, feelings, emotions and provides the opportunity to process them. During yoga therapy sessions, we explore edges safely with the support of the practitioner. My husband didn’t have to be in that edge for too long as she was born quickly and let out a soft cry.

I feel that this birth healed him of his trauma of the stillbirth. I have a feeling that my mom who also supported me during birth also got some healing from it. It was the first time she has supported and witnessed a birth. She takes pride that she was the first one to see the baby come out. My mom being with me probably healed my own birth trauma which was a C-section. I have really come full circle with this birth.

Having experienced struggles with fertility, pregnancy, pre-eclampsia, birth, pregnancy loss, and postpartum depression; I can hold space for other women facing these challenges. I feel it’s important to process past trauma, as it helps to deal these challenges with grace. It also gives acceptance of birth as it happens. I strived to have natural births and was blessed with short effective births because of the self-work I had done. My recommendation for anybody on this journey to do whatever mode of healing that resonates with you to clear all the blocks within you. If whatever comes up becomes too much, I am here as a resource to witness your process.

My best wishes for you all to have fun conceptions, happy, healthy pregnancies, short, pleasurable births and blissful postpartum periods.

Location: Online from the comfort of your home

Rate: $72/session

Contact: swetha@sdharma.com